Here I Go Again

You know how you have those days that you just don't feel that motivated? It seems like all of your energy goes first thing in the morning just dragging yourself out of bed. You don't know whether or not you'll make it through the day, so you drink 5 cups of coffee, while trying to see some positivity...but for some reason everything seems gray.

I keep telling myself in times like this that I'll be just fine, and that I'm okay, and that maybe I'm simply in a bad mood. Well obviously it's the latter.

But here's the kicker.

I don't like being in bad moods!

In fact I hate it. I would rather be happy all day long, loving life, and seeing rainbow colors everywhere. So is it really choice for everyone to be depressed? I thought happiness was a choice...and I still believe that, but some days I do wonder if it really is possible just to choose happiness just like that.

Marcus Aurelius writes that a person is most fulfilled when he can be content without having to escape. That a person is truly peaceful if he can find peace, not in the country, but while living in the city. That Isolation is not healthy, because if that is how you grasp at peace, at sanity, then perhaps you are not living up to your true potential. Perhaps that is right,

and so now I will sleep on exactly that.

I will from here forth practice finding my peace in the midst of whatever and wherever I am at. And along with that, I will trust that people love me, and that things will be okay no matter what I'm going through. If I have faith in that, then so shall it be.